Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Final Payment to President Chimpy McShithead of TX

That's what I wrote in the "For" field of my check made out to the United States Treasury.

I may be living in France now, but I still pay US taxes. And today is that highest of high holy days, Tax Day.

While I used to look forward to doing my taxes - I typically got a big refund - this year I was nervous. I'd waited 'til the last moment to do it, and as has been the trend for the middle class under President Chimpy McShithead of Texas, I've been owing money to the government lately. On top of the costs of relocating to another country, there's the whole pathetic exchange rate to deal with. (Today's glorious rate: €1=$1.58) So I'm loathe to spend any more money than is necessary.

And wouldn't you know it? I owe. As does Alannah. Luckily, our total owed is reasonable, so it wasn't too painful. In fact, the check I cut is easily less than the price of a decent dinner for two in Paris.

But I'll bitch and moan about having to pay even pennies to a government that provides me with no healthcare, crap for education, a joke of a transit system, and a blunder of a war.

Sure, around this time next year, I'll be forking out thousands of euros (they don't withhold taxes from paychecks here) in one painful chunk, at a percentage likely outstripping anything I paid in the US, even under a high bracket during a Democratic presidency. (Let's just say I was making - and paying - bank in those "golden" years under President Slippery McSkeevy of Arkansas.)

In exchange, though, I'll be enjoying full health coverage, dirt cheap education, subsidized and plentiful transit, more public art than you can shake a stick at, and best of all, regulated bread prices. In fact, a hot, fresh, artisanal baguette - 250 grams of flaky, chewy goodness - costs less than one international stamp to mail in your blood money.

I'm so glad I'm someplace where they've got their priorities straight!


  1. I'm happy for your new found happiness in gay Paris, but you "owing money to the government" has zipola to do with President Bush (which we both are disappointed in for completely opposite reasons), middle class trends or anything else, it means you did not have enough withheld from your paycheck. I got some bread back this year but that means I missed out 4-5% interest on the CD on said refund.

    Meanwhile I agree with you on transit and think the French version of making everyone pay at the last second is brilliant...attempts to raise taxes will be absolutely futile when people are pissed off ;)


  2. I'm gonna have to go ahead and disagree... ;)

    I'm paying much more percentage-wise than when I was making more. Ugh.

    They'll cut heads off over the price of bread here. I wouldn't dare suggest raising taxes unless it comes with massive benefits.

  3. I think that technically I'm supposed to file a return in the States because I'm a citizen but I just don't make enough. Are you sure it's your 'final' payment? lol

    My parents don't file in the US either although they are probably supposed to.

    (they don't withhold taxes from paychecks here)

    How do people do it? Just save through the year? I'd have to do that. I'd have a really hard time with that. Hope they have high interest savings accounts or short term investment accounts that offer decent interest and allow you to withdraw your money without penalty.

    ahh you sound like a proper socialist. Welcome back from the Dark Side brother. ;)

  4. It may be a bit (ok, very!) socialist here, but they actually do the personal responsibility thing by making you save your tax money on your own. So if you fuck up, it's your fault.

    Luckily, if you have direct deposit, you can set it up with your bank so that X-percentage of your paycheck goes into an interest-bearing savings account. The fact that so many people have to choose banks and accounts on their own makes the banks more competitive with their rates. So apparently, they do capitalism better over here, too. *sigh*

  5. is your company hiring? can't we all move to beret country?

  6. Yes, we're hiring! But only if you wear a beret and horizontal stripes every day. Smoking unfiltered Gauloises and growing a goatee is optional, but the latter is possible on an equal opportunity basis with hormone therapy.